maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
