Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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