We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
Randomize