We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Randomize
