how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
i believe in u and ur pee
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
Randomize
