There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
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