i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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