Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Randomize
