I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize
