dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
sarcasm needs its own font
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Randomize
