He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I deserve this hangover.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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