Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
