I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
false alarm. still invincible.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
