Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
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