Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
