I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
I skipped work to stalk him.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
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