dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Randomize
