Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Randomize
