There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
