omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
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