Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
