weddingsv make me drug and hornr
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Randomize
