I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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