Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
