I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
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