is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Randomize
