It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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