its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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