There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
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