One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
