I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize
