Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
