we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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