Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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