awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
