Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Randomize
