ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Randomize
