Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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