I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
