is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Randomize
