Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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