I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Randomize
