Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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