Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
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