Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Randomize