i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
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