So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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