Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
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