it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
Randomize
