I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Randomize
