we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I will pee on everything he values.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
